I have spent lots of my time recently learning about trauma. I am glued to the teachings of Dr. Peter Levine. He’s a best-selling author of books related to trauma. He is also someone who has experienced trauma himself.
“Trauma is perhaps the most avoided, ignored, belittled, denied, misunderstood, and untreated cause of human suffering.”
— Peter A Levine, PhD
Trauma is defined as a situation where someone perceives a situation as being a threat, as stated by Dr. Peter Levine. Trauma is a part of life and our bodies remember it, causing us to go into auto-pilot when we encounter new perceived threats. In my organizing sessions, I often see clients experiencing a default reaction that they cannot explain, as their bodies remember trauma even when their minds do not.
That’s where it gets complicated. How can we fix something that we don’t even know is an issue? How can I, as a professional organizer, help clients get past being stuck if the client doesn’t even know they are stuck? Although I am not a therapist, I can still educate myself and be compassionate towards my clients. I can recognize when trauma shows up in our sessions and hope that my clients will hear what I have learned and take the necessary steps to seek help for themselves.
So how does trauma show up in sessions?
It usually occurs during the decision-making process. When it’s time to determine if something should be kept, tossed, donated, or sold. With my empathic and intuitive abilities I can see on a client’s face when they struggle. The thinking begins. Sometimes the decision is easy and sometimes it’s not. They may distract themselves with something else in the room or create an excuse to divert. Becoming angry or sad is often a reaction. Quickly making a decision (to keep the item) and avoid the decision altogether also occurs. All these avoidance tactics are why the clutter built up in the first place. I have to use my instincts and know if it’s a good time to push them on the decision or let it go. With experience, it becomes easier to know which path to take.
What are my favorite tools when confronted by trauma in a session?
One of the most effective tools I use in certain situations is to remain silent. I give my clients their own space and time to think. Sometimes, all they need is a minute or two to work through any obstacles they are facing. Although silence can feel uncomfortable, I know its value, and I have seen it work wonders. By remaining quiet, I am giving my clients a valuable gift of time to think. Often, people haven’t given much thought to their belongings or situations. They are constantly bombarded with information and moving on to the next thing. Therefore, the time we spend together making decisions is critically important. That’s why I often hear from clients, “I would never be able to do this without you!”
When you’re deciding to get rid of things, it’s important to take your time and observe your feelings. Pay attention to what’s happening with your body while you’re making decisions. Are you feeling tense? Are your thoughts unclear? Do you start to sweat? Do you freeze up? Or do you feel like crying or getting angry? Take note of your feelings when you’re struggling. These could be signs that your body is reacting to trauma and that trauma is holding you back.
Do you need help with clutter due to trauma?
If you are struggling with clutter and feel that trauma may be a contributing factor, please feel free to set up a phone consultation with me. I am eager to assist anyone dealing with these challenges and can even recommend a therapist who can provide additional support.
